SEPTEMBER 20, 2015

Sometimes it just hits me. The life we are living is just so completely upside down.  It’s not supposed to be this way. It’s supposed to be…. NORMAL.

Sometimes I have days like this…. where I will hit some kind of trigger…. something will set my mind off this cliff. I will start to wallow in my pity. I will start thinking of all the bad stuff happening. I will dwell on the fact that my life sucks. And how I am so incredibly tired I just want to cry. I want to run to my bed and hide under my covers…. and just cry.

But I can’t. I can’t do any of that. I have to keep going. I have to keep moving. I have to just suck it up and move along. I have to finish off the day. I have to be strong for my kids. I can’t cry because then they will cry and then they’ll make me cry even more then I’ll get mad because I’m crying. ..

*sigh *

Sometimes. …I’m just exhausted.
Sometimes I just want the day to end.
Sometimes I just want to eat or drink or be left alone. Sometimes, days like today, I feel like a zombie. I’m a total mess. I wish these days would pass quickly. I have been wondering lately when these feelings will end… if they ever will. I guess I just need time. ♡